Suicidal Tendencies The Miracle lyrics

I sailed forever, I sailed so far, and now I know just what the consequences are
I laughed out loudly, while I cried inside
But I didn't have the strength to say enough of this ride
Like a fool - I believed in a miracle
I wanted to forget, of what I'm not sure
But I found an answer - it seemed to be a perfect cure
Controlled my actions, controlled my thoughts
Controlled my feelings, and now I feel my body rot - like a fool
I believed in the miracle

Twisted and I'm running - freezed then I'm burning
Laughing then I'm crying - am I living or am I dying
Swearing then I'm praying - don't even know what I'm saying
Happy then so sad - forgiven then so mad

Do you still, do you still believe, do you still believe in, do you still believe in miracles?

Pushing then pulling - who am I fooling

A friend then a foe - do I really even know?
Love and then hate
Peace then at war - but what am I fighting for
And you always try to
Keep me - oh so sleepy
So I can't realize - that it's all lies
And the more it takes hold on me - the less chance that I'll ever be free
And even though I don't believe - it's so hard to leave - a miracle - a miracle

Waiting - always hesitating - for the perfect day - that day was yesterday
And the more you're gonna wait - the more of chance that it will be too late

How can you afford to wait, you just can't afford to wait
I shed a tear I won't deny it, but just one tear and I already cried it
And now you'll see me cry no more, don't even know what I was crying for