Dan Bern Beautiful Trees lyrics

I'm as cranky as a bitch
All I wanna do is spit
Ain't nothing to eat after that feast
Been gettin' laid regular at least

And I don't wanna hurt you
So stay out of my way today

Every twenty eight days women bleed
Unless they get too much of your seed
But men gotta flush themselves out, too
But it's always sexual when they do
You women, you just stick some pad inside
Men gotta practically fall in fucking love

Beautiful trees, beautiful trees

Beautiful trees, beautiful trees

Let's not beat around the bush that's bad luck
I asked you in 'cause I wanna fuck
I asked you out 'cause I was hungry
But now I'm basically just tired

You don't have to leave
You can stay here
After all, this is still a love song

Beautiful trees, beautiful trees
Beautiful trees, beautiful trees