Let me regale a tale of woe
With such a bitter end
Involving a gig and lots of booze
It's hard to comprehend
I found myself deep in my cups
Pissed out of my head
And with a bladder full to bursting
I crawled into my bed
Horns of ale and pints of beer
I'm filled to the brim
An alcoholic tug of war
That I don't think I can win
Ureaka! I've done it!
The amber nectar flows
I got so drunk in the middle of Preston
I pissed all on my clothes
Ureaka! I've done it!
Made sense at the time
To cast off my blue denim jeans
And soak them in urine!
Bleary eyed, pounding skull
I woke to dire straits
Discovering what I'd done last night
When I opened the flood gates
A pool of shame and wee-wee
Upon my sisters floor
I knelt down and sobbed
In the waste that I had poured
Koppabergs and Jager shots
A veritable cocktail
I didn't know my night would end
With such an epic fail
NOOOOOO!!!
My jeans?! What have I done?
I'm going to have to wash them...
No...
