Good Old War Close to Honesty lyrics

I won't be running away
I know how it looks, but I wouldn't do that
What am I trying to say?
It's not like I'm gone
It's not like I left you

Forcing my way out the door
I knew that my will just couldn't be trusted

I should leave something behind
I'll say by mistake,
But you'll know I'm lying,

Don't wanna leave
It's the start of the end
Don't think it's easy for me

Don't wanna leave
That's the closest to honesty you're gonna get outta me

How come I cannot control
The way that I feel when I think about you?
Tried to do so many things
So it doesn't hurt and I can forget you

I know I'm forced to give in
I'll try not to do this again
The past has it in for me now
I'm going down