Ben Folds & Nick Hornby Levi Johnston's Blues lyrics

Woke up this morning, what do I see?
Three thousand cameras pointed at me
Dude says, "You Levi?", I'm like, "Yes, that's me, sir"
"Well, you just knocked up the V.P. nominee's daughter"

So I tell him, "No, you got it wrong, mister
Already got a girl and her name is Bristol"
They all laugh and say, "Where you been, sonny?
Your mother-in-law's a heartbeat from the presidency"

So I say, "Mother-in-law? No, we ain't getting married"
They say, "Soon you will, boy, she just announced it"
I get on my dirt bike and ride to my girl's home
Gonna lay down the law, tell her what's going on

I'm a fucking redneck, I live to hang out with the boys
Play some hockey, do some fishing and kill some moose
I like to shoot the shit, do some chilling, I guess
You fuck with me and I kick your ass

So we talk and it turns out we don't believe in abortion
And sex outside marriage is against our religion
And when I try to tell 'em, "I'm eighteen years old"
They say, "Levi, it's too late, you gotta do as you're told"

I say, "Mother-in-law? No, we ain't getting married"
They say, "Soon you will, boy, she just announced it"
I get on my dirt bike and ride to my girl's home

Gonna lay down the law and tell her what's going on

I'm a fucking redneck, I live to hang out with the boys
Play some hockey, do some fishing and kill some moose
I like to shoot the shit and do some chilling, I guess
You fuck with me and I kick your ass

I'm a fucking redneck, I live to hang out with the boys
Play some hockey, do some fishing and kill some moose
I like to shoot the shit and do some chilling I guess
You fuck with me and I kick your ass

I'm a fucking redneck, I live to hang out with the boys
Get on my snowboard, do some fishing and kill some moose
I like to shoot the shit and do some chilling, I guess
You fuck with me and I kick your ass

Yeah
I like to do some shit and do some chilling, I guess
Kill some moose

I'm a fucking redneck, I live to hang out with the boys
Play some hockey, do some fishing and kill some moose
I like to shoot the shit and do some chilling, I guess
You fuck with me and I kick your ass