Amateur Transplants Couples Counselling D lyrics

I've got a broadband connection
and a laptop with a pentium four processor
with intel inside.

My girlfriend thought I needed it
for PowerPoint and other shit,
but when I told her that I guess I lied.

When I'm at my desk and I get the horn,
down goes my left hand, up comes the porn.

I've filled my C: drive up with pic's
of Abbie Titmus sucking dicks,
and several hundred home movies
like Pamela and Tommy-Lee's
have I given you a clue?
that bare celebrities are what I like to view.

I love those bare celebrities,

those hardcore bare celebrities,
forget about your girlfriends and your lives!

I mean those bare celebrities,
those Paris Hilton MPG's,
and double-penetration readers wives (.com)!

I love those bare celebrities,
those online bare celebrities,
my mates think I'm a big computer geek...

But I'm just browsing celebrities,
and JPG's of under-three's...

They caught me and my case comes up next week!