Mark McGuire Opening Presents lyrics

these are the coolest...
aren't they?
oh yeah...
mooey christmas!
hmhmhm....
screw christmas!
haha...
for you, and mom...
what are they called jeff?
magic stretch.
hahaha!
he's not even 30 and he's already in "magic stretch"
magic stretch!
what - did you go to the senior shop for those?
yeah!
haha...

oh does he still have erin?
don't break the ice!
oh, wow...
that's a fun game. i used to have that game..
didn't you used to play that at nursery school?
well i have one from janine that she thought was so funny...
is this the funny thing?
yeah..
i mean, i think it's funny but i think it's cool :)
alright!
pete canepa was goin, oh she'll love this..
i do!
chia pet!
what is it, jame?
chia herb garden..

i got...nerf master blaster! nerf master blaster!!
oh my god..
i wanna play with this right now...
hahaha...
wow, and i got a keychain gun from home..
wow!
nerf master blaster!

look at gram in the hall...gram in the hall!
oh...she's got it on 'er double thing...
and the reason, you know why they don't get the red eye?
because they turn their heads..

daddy, look it!

oh god, now just something else to destroy the house..
haha...

hey shoot one at - shoot one at the camera!
shoot one at the camera...
watch the hummels...
aim low...
pull it back, matt...
(pop)
ahh! ow! ahh!
hahah...
pull back, matt...
(pop)
ohhhh, right in the gut..
(pop)
oh! a direct hit! these kids are deadly!

'ey grammaw...haha
(pop)
ah!
oh, it fires when you pull it back..
yeah..
oh, you gotta pump it up i think..
yeah, you pump it up...
why won't this one come out?
you better not stick your face in front of that..
haha...
really...
i don't know why that one won't come out...
what does it say on the package, ages 12 and up??
haha...
six and up...
i could have fun with that...

guess what..
when we to bed the one ni-
last night when we went to bed,
mom forgot to leave santa the cookies..
oh she did? well, santa doesn't care...